Patrick Pankalla

Just, Like, Realizing Things


Sweater – DieselFedora Hat – H&M Jewelry – PERSUEDE

We just jumped into a new year, and Jesus Christ, 2016 has passed us quickly! BUT let’s rewind time before I continue. I remember last year’s New Year’s Eve and my conversation with Lisa Kastleen as it was yesterday. We stood on the roof in the middle of Copenhagen with a glass of champagne in our hand and looked at the beautiful fireworks that illuminated the otherwise dark night sky. We had one of those deep conversations we often have, which was about our expectations for the new year and what we wanted to achieve.

We were quite sure that it would be OUR year and we would take over the world and show everyone that we have much more to offer than what we’ve shown so far. Now we have just started a new year and nothing went as expected and desired. I can obviously only speak for myself and go into details on behalf of myself. I had set a lot of different realistic goals that I would strive to achieve before the year was out, but as I stand here on the other side of 2016, I can only cross out 2 out of 10 goals. This is a disappointment in itself.

BUT although I haven’t achieved everything that I desired, the year has on many points been MY year. I’ve been all the way down where nothing made sense anymore and wanted most of all to not exist anymore, been surrounded by negative energy, moved away from CPH and spent far too much time to drive far to get to my former job in the city, had a hell lot of inner struggles, which among other things contained a identity crisis, a minor personality disorder and a lot of other things that I want to address in a separate post. Although nothing went as desired, 2016 was still a good year, especially for my psyche and my relationship with myself. I’ve been trapped in a roundabout way too long and hasn’t been able to pull myself together to figure out which exit I should take. I’ve been afraid of the unknown and therefore have unconsciously chosen to be in this roundabout. Somehow I came up of the hole, made a decision, chose the direction and rolled away.

2016 was the year where I came much closer to getting back to myself again, became more positive and regained my go-do attitude, put the whole ‘clubber’ life behind me for good and cut my circle of friends to the bone, became wiser about each individual, which is particularly rooted in my former work with children. 2016 was also the year where I moved back to Copenhagen, finished English and psychology, realized a big dream and launched my own jewelry brand (PERSUEDE), experienced a completely different culture in Morocco (warmest trip ever, btw), was flown to Stockholm by Diesel to attend an event, visited my friend in London and got hired by HUMAN UNIVERZ where I’m work at the office with my lovely friend!

The year of 2016 was basically … actually, Kylie said it quite accurately in a video at the beginning of the year.

“Like, I feel like every year has a new energy, and I feel like this year is really about, like, the year of just realizing stuff. And everyone around me, we’re all just, like, realizing things.”